Friday, May 20, 2011

White knight

In fairy tales the evil person is always some kind of troll or wizard and the hero is always a knight, who then rushes to the damsel in distress and saves her from the evil clutches of the aforementioned evil doer. 

As it would appear parts of real life have evolved to this as well. The part I am referring to is the internet. Every single person on the internet has an over inflated sense of confidence. The only thing that separates the people is what they do with this confidence.

You will always get some helpless girl posting some kind of comment that incites criticism and then the two warriors emerge. You get the evil person you will criticise, mock and joke about it and then with the sound of trumpets and the galloping of a horse he appears.

The internet white knight, whose only mission is to fight off the evil trolls and rescue the damsel. *insert screeching tyre sound here* the only problem is that there is no real damsel. She isn't going to like you because you rescued her and it's not a fairy tale where Good always triumphs.

Let’s address the first issue, guys, if a woman makes a stupid comment and some guy then calls her dumb, and you retaliate by saying she is amazing and wonderful and no one should call her dumb, and that she shouldn’t listen to other people. Just because you want her to like you saying those things won’t help. She would rather be with funny guy than with piss-all-over-your-party guy.

Most people on the internet know to take everything with a pinch of salt, except the new guy who has just learned about the internets and is now facebooking, typing with one finger and still clicks on spyware ads, who is Mr white-knight himself. Generally with a lower IQ, very bad sarcasm understanding, no comprehension for humour and no wit.

That is why the evil wizard will always Win. In real life the white knight probably has a weight advantage and can beat you, but on the interwebs you are just a figure in the big mind game, and if your mind can't play along, then you lose.

I suppose I would then have to say that I am a proud evil doer and I like it. Come on white knights, me and my insane posse will troll you and beat you with magic.

Now exiting geek mode  

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