Thursday, March 17, 2011

Fast food

Everyone has been in the mood for some or other type of fast food. So much so that you got in your car and drove there and ordered the meal for which your mouth has been watering.

Finally your food is done. You quickly seal the packet so that none of the heat gets released and drive home in a hurry. You get home, run inside, open the door and jump onto the couch. By now you are salivating like a great-dane about to eat a steak and you can hardly contain yourself.


You take out that burger and apologize to it for what you are about to do to it, and then take that gigantic first bite. As you are chewing you taste something is wrong. Conveniently their mayo was finished so they just put 'fire from the gates of Hell' sauce on instead. Your eyes start watering and your sinuses are cleared and you can't really decide if your eyes are watering because someone lit a magnesium fire in your mouth or if you in fact are actually crying because of disappointment.

Why would some people be so mean? The worst thing to do is to mess with a man’s food. So I'm only going to say this once, and with all due respect you useless retard that couldn't finish school and was too lazy to make something of yourself, stop trying to fool yourself into thinking that you have power over people by changing their order.

Tell us what is happening with our food and maybe we will put a few cents in your empty tip jar to pay the way forward for your miserable little life.

Do you see how i used the words"with all due respect" to make this statement less hateful. So the lesson for today is, if you really want to say something bad to people just add the words “with all due respect” in front of what you want to say and then it's all ok and fair game.

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