Thursday, December 9, 2010

Road Rage

Yesterday on the way home sitting in traffic and contemplating the values of society, considering the story I had just heard about a grandfather grooming little children to have intercourse. Then all of a sudden I hear this commotion coming from the car next to me. As I glance over I see this very agitated and aggravated white man leaning over to the passenger seat.

Then he comes upright wielding something wrapped in a cloth which appears to be heavy and quite large. Firstly I’m trying to figure out what this is all about, and then I see the car in front of him in the bumper to bumper traffic has left about 3 car lengths between him and the car ahead of him, which is legally the correct following distance. 

So I assume that the man in the back car was so agitated because the car in front wasn’t moving fast enough. Back to the heavy wrapped object, by now I could see wood at the handle. Let me just make it clear that at this point I started realising that this is probably some form of road rage and could escalate at any second.

Like a moth to a flame I carried on staring at this man with a foreign object. It turned out to be a hammer, like a 4 pound hammer, and he just waved it at the guy in front, I suppose that in “road-rage-lingo” that means “I’m going to pound you if you don’t move!” However I could be wrong, my “road-rage-lingo” is a bit rusty.

Obviously he is angry at the world, so angry that he thinks two car lengths will make traffic better, and get him home quicker. Just relax buddy, the only thing you are doing is raising your stress levels and probably building up enough anger that you will one day just keel over and have a stroke. Life isn’t that serious.

I know I would’ve loved to have seen some real action, you know, something more exciting than a guy waving his 4 pound hammer around, but am also glad that Mr Hammer didn’t get out and pound the crap out of that poor guys car. So either way, I’m happy!


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